* Simply Me ;)

Feeling a bit lost now…Wat’s the purpose for us to study in UNI? Wat’s the aim that i hav during these study times in UNI? Wat kind of UNI life i wish to hav? Wat’s the responsibilities of a UNI student? –> Choon Jye asked this Qs yday, telling us that lotsa student dunno wat’s their responsibilies towards the society. Yea, we din know at all, because we’re not educated in that way. We’re taught to gain high marks in our examinations, taught to score as much A’s as possible (to show ppl that u’re really clever), taught to memorize all kinds of formulae, taught to read our text books over & over again…So, wat we’ve learnt from that? Good memorizing power, good copying power, but lost ourselves… So wat’s the purpose of studying? To lost ourselves? Or self-remolding?

I suddenly dunno y i wanna come to MMU, wat aim i’m gonna achieve here? I think i neva thought bout that, coz it’s too natural for us, after UPSR is PMR, then SPM, then STPM, & eventually UNI, this should be the only way, rite? Or mayb we can juz further on Master & PHD.

At the very beginning, i tot wanna hav a really simple UNI life, in the context of i study & get my degree. But for sure, this is not the thing that i REALLY wanted. Although i know this isn’t the thing i wan, but i’m repeating this routine day to day. Go to class, then back to hostel, then hav dinner, back to room…If life continues like that, there wont be any happy ending for me i guess. I know that there’s something in my heart that i couldn’t get rid off, & i can juz leave it to the time. As time pass by, i hope it’ll gone with the wind.

My fren asking me to join CLS (Chinese Language Society), till now i’m not even the member YET. I juz couldn’t recall back the time, during my high school, how much i’m keen on Chinese Society, how much i ardently love the society. But now, i can’t even make an initiative to become a member of it. Why? My fren asked me…why? I’m wondering also, feel like joining but something pulling back on me. There comes the next Qs…Wat pulls back??? Unanswered again… Should or shouldn’t join? I think i’ll choose YES. Because back to the fundamental part of me, i still love that, juz that there’re some factors affecting me…Okie, made a decision now, but i still couldn’t answer the Qs. Mayb i’ve known the answer, juz that i’m trying to avoid. Am i still lost?!